I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
