you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
