as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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