question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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