Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
