sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
