No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
