Say something about gay babies.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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