I heard we made out
I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
