i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
