WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
