i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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