I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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