paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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