I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
