Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize