I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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