found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
