We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
so let's talk penis.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize