Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
