My balls are so social today.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Randomize
