I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
