love makes seman taste better
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
