thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
