I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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