How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I am one with the molecules
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
