Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Randomize
