Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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