i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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