making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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