you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
