I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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