Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
