no, he came in my armpit
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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