Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
