If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize