wat bout pragnant strippers??
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
