Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
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