so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
