I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
