I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
