too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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