There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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