Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
