You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
