Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
