If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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