We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
