Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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