i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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